“Keep Your Opinions to Yourself!” — Reality Star Ese Eriata Slams Critics Judging Women Who Have Children Outside Marriage

Reality TV star and actress Ese Eriata has once again made headlines after she fiercely responded to a social media user who criticized women for giving birth outside wedlock. The outspoken influencer, known for never holding back her thoughts, took to her Instagram comment section to school a follower who implied that unmarried women having children was a sign of moral decline. What started as a simple post soon spiraled into a heated online debate, but Ese didn’t hesitate to clap back with a message that hit deep and resonated with many.

It all began when a follower identified as chinazylilien commented, “Every girl just dey born anyhow without being married, mmmh,” under one of Ese’s posts. While some might have ignored such a statement, Ese decided to tackle the comment head-on, delivering a sharp yet emotional response that exposed the ignorance and judgmental tendencies of many on social media.

The former Big Brother Naija housemate wasted no time firing back. “@chinazylilien hardworking wife, abeg try shut up and focus on your marriage. Them no dey pick husband for ground carry go house,” she began, making it clear that people should mind their own affairs before poking into others’ lives. Ese didn’t just stop there; she went on to express the frustrations and emotional battles many women face while being judged by society for their life choices.

In her lengthy response, Ese poured out her heart, saying, “In as much as marriage is a good thing, some people don't think or wonder why a person chose a certain path. You don't know my past, you don't know if I have trauma or been abused, you don't know if I have trust or anger issues I'm trying to heal from.” Her words painted a vivid picture of how quick society is to condemn women without understanding the emotional, psychological, and personal struggles that shape their decisions.

She continued, “You don't know if I’m taking my time to study who I want to end up with, you don’t know if there’s something I’m waiting for to click before I say yes I want to marry, you don’t know my fears and worries, you don’t know if I’m mentally ready.” Ese’s response not only highlighted the importance of self-awareness and emotional readiness in relationships but also questioned the unhealthy pressure society places on women to marry at a certain age or have children under a specific condition.

For many, her words struck a chord. In a world where women are constantly scrutinized for every life decision—from their marital status to their motherhood journey—Ese’s statement felt like a breath of fresh air. She reminded her followers that everyone’s path in life is different and that judgment, especially from those who don’t know another person’s story, is both cruel and unnecessary.

The reality star further emphasized the double standards women face when it comes to societal expectations. In another post, she wrote, “You'll hear them shouting ‘once you are 30+ and no husband just have your kids.’ When you go ahead to have kids, they’ll say, ‘Where is the father? Oh no husband, hmmm single mother.’ When you choose to wait on the Lord and now clock 40+, you’ll hear, ‘Oh, just look at you; as beautiful as you are, you don’t even have at least one child even if you didn’t see husband.’”

Ese’s words perfectly captured the hypocrisy many women experience — damned if they do, damned if they don’t. According to her, society is always ready to criticize no matter what choice a woman makes, leaving her stuck between unrealistic expectations and harsh judgments.

She added, “When God now finally bring love or husband, you’ll now hear, ‘The guy didn’t see younger girls; what is he doing with a single mother?’ And what’s flabbergasting in all of this; majority of the people saying these things are women.” Her last line sparked a new wave of conversation online, as many followers agreed that women are often the ones who perpetuate the very stigma they complain about.

Ese’s response has since gone viral, drawing reactions from fans, fellow celebrities, and women who relate deeply to her message. Some applauded her courage for speaking up, while others urged society to do better in supporting women instead of tearing them down. One fan commented, “Thank you, Ese, for saying this out loud. People need to stop acting like marriage is the only validation of a woman’s worth.” Another wrote, “The truth you said will sting, but it’s needed. Many women are living in silence because of judgment.”

The incident reignited a larger conversation about the pressures of womanhood in African society, where marriage and childbearing are often seen as the ultimate markers of success. Ese’s bold words served as a reminder that no two journeys are the same and that emotional healing, personal growth, and timing play major roles in the decisions people make.

It’s not the first time Ese Eriata has challenged social norms or clapped back at online critics. Over the years, she has built a reputation for using her platform to speak out on issues like body shaming, double standards, and mental health. Her authenticity and refusal to conform to societal expectations have earned her both admirers and critics — but she seems unfazed.

In a digital age where trolling and unsolicited opinions flood every post, Ese’s stand feels both refreshing and necessary. She has once again proven that social media is not just a place for glamour but also a tool to challenge societal norms and educate others on empathy and understanding.

The debate around her comment section continued long after her post, with many women sharing their personal experiences of being judged for not marrying early or for having children outside marriage. A few men also joined the conversation, some agreeing with Ese’s stance, while others clung to traditional beliefs about family structure.

But through it all, Ese’s message remained clear: women should not be boxed into societal expectations or shamed for their choices. Every woman’s journey is unique, and no one has the right to define what happiness or success looks like for another.

Her words echo a truth many are still too afraid to admit — that the harshest critics of women often come from within their own circles, and that empathy is the one virtue still missing in today’s world of instant opinions. Whether or not people agree with her, Ese Eriata has once again sparked a conversation that needed to be had. And if there’s one thing this incident proves, it’s that she’s not afraid to use her voice — loud, raw, and unapologetic — to defend women’s right to choose their own paths without shame.