“I’m Better Off Alone”: Man Laments After Spending Over ₦100k on a Date That Ended in Silence

Social media has once again been thrown into a heated conversation about modern dating, money, and expectations after a Nigerian man, identified as Olamilekan with the handle @SirPerryy, shared his regrettable experience of spending over ₦100,000 on a single date that ended with no follow-up communication. His post, which has since gone viral on X (formerly Twitter), sparked a wave of reactions from both men and women who shared their own stories, opinions, and frustrations about the dynamics of dating in 2025.

According to Olamilekan, he met a lady he thought was worth getting to know, and they decided to go on a date two weeks ago. The outing, which he expected to be a simple and pleasant experience, ended up being one of the most financially draining and disappointing encounters he’s had in recent times. He narrated how he spent a total of ₦109,000 on food alone, with an additional ₦18,000 spent on transportation via Bolt, making the total bill nearly ₦130,000 — all for a date that led nowhere.

In his words, “Went on a first date two weeks ago. Food 109k, bolt 18k. Now we aren’t talking anymore. Learned to never do that again. If you aren’t going on a walk or to a restaurant I recommend and you recommend more expensive ones, I’ll ghost from there.” He further expressed disbelief at how the evening went, saying the lady ordered food worth ₦90,000 — much of which they couldn’t even finish — only to then order additional items. In a move that many online users found both bold and inconsiderate, the lady allegedly packed up the leftovers and took them home without even asking if Olamilekan wanted any part of the food he had paid for.

The viral tweet ended with a tone of exhaustion and clarity. “Ngl I’m better off alone. Tired of meeting funny people,” he concluded, using the now-viral phrase that’s quickly becoming a symbol of frustration among many Nigerian men who feel taken advantage of in dating situations.

Almost immediately, his post ignited heated debates online. Many users, particularly men, rallied in support of him, calling his experience a painful but necessary lesson about boundaries and discernment. They argued that it’s high time men learned to stop equating expensive dates with meaningful connections, emphasizing that genuine relationships should not begin with financial showmanship or the pressure to impress.

One user commented, “You spent ₦100k trying to prove you’re capable, but she just saw it as a free luxury meal. This generation needs to start understanding that money doesn’t buy chemistry.” Another echoed the sentiment, writing, “It’s not even about being stingy. It’s about mutual respect. If someone orders ₦90k food without blinking, that’s a red flag.”

However, not everyone sided with Olamilekan. Some users argued that dating expenses are part of the game, and that if he couldn’t afford to take someone out to an expensive place, he shouldn’t have agreed to it in the first place. A few even suggested that the lady might have perceived his willingness to spend as an indicator of comfort and generosity — and acted accordingly. One user remarked, “If she recommended the restaurant and you agreed, you can’t blame her for ordering what she wanted. Maybe she thought you didn’t mind since you didn’t say anything.”

This back-and-forth perfectly encapsulates the ongoing tension between modern dating expectations and financial reality. In an economy where the cost of living continues to soar and inflation has pushed the price of even basic meals to staggering levels, a ₦109,000 dinner bill feels increasingly unreasonable to many. Yet, for some, the culture of “soft life” — characterized by luxury, indulgence, and social status — continues to dominate dating spaces, particularly among young Nigerians trying to portray a certain lifestyle online.

The situation also highlights how first dates, once meant for connection and conversation, have increasingly turned into performances of status. The line between genuine interest and material exploitation has grown thinner, leaving many people disillusioned. Olamilekan’s story isn’t just a random rant — it’s a reflection of a larger cultural fatigue, where many feel that dating has become more about display than depth.

His final words, “I’m better off alone,” resonated with thousands. The tweet became more than a personal complaint; it became a statement of emotional exhaustion in a dating culture where people feel pressured to prove their worth through spending rather than sincerity. Many men replied with their own experiences, sharing how they too have spent significant amounts on dates that led nowhere, or how they’ve become more selective about where and how they spend their money.

Women, on the other hand, offered varying perspectives. Some sympathized with him, agreeing that what the lady did was inconsiderate. Others pointed out that dates should be mutually beneficial and that both parties should communicate clearly about expectations. A few noted that it’s unfair to generalize all women based on one person’s actions, reminding men that thoughtful and respectful women still exist — just as some men still overstep boundaries in other ways.

The post also sparked a new wave of humor on X, with users sharing memes, jokes, and sarcastic “advice” on how to avoid such situations. Some suggested taking future dates to roadside bukas or suya spots to “test humility,” while others joked that a walk at the beach or a home-cooked meal might be the safest way to discover someone’s true character.

Amid the laughter and debate, one thing is clear — Olamilekan’s experience touched a nerve. It shed light on a growing social problem: the transactional mindset creeping into relationships. The emphasis on luxury, appearances, and financial performance is gradually replacing the core essence of dating — companionship, emotional connection, and shared values.

While many sympathize with his frustration, others see it as an opportunity for reflection — a reminder that setting boundaries and communicating expectations are not signs of stinginess, but of emotional maturity. The lessons from his story go beyond the ₦100k dinner; they point to the importance of self-awareness and discernment in a world where social media validation often overshadows genuine connection.

As the post continues to circulate, people have started using the phrase “better off alone” as both a cautionary tagline and a declaration of independence. For Olamilekan, the experience may have been expensive, but it left him with a priceless realization — sometimes solitude is far cheaper, far simpler, and far more peaceful than trying to impress the wrong person.

And for everyone watching from the sidelines, his story might just be the reminder we all need: in the quest for love, it’s better to walk away broke but wiser than to keep spending money trying to buy affection that was never real to begin with.